Sleepless Hope

So this past week I had a dreadful episode of insomnia. It all began with being in an uncomfortable sleeping environment for far too long, and then I had one too many cups of coffee at the wrong time of the day. For six days, I could not sleep. On that sixth day my anxiety got the best of me and I was just having panic attack, after panic attack. It clouded my judgment, and frightened me to my very core. I began to lose hope, and actually convinced myself that it was all over for me. Then I went to bed, and suddenly had the best sleep ever. As if my body just fell into a temporary coma. The dreams I had that night were lucid and breathtaking. Still, when I woke I felt tormented by a slight bit of grogginess and anxiety, for I only got about seven hours of sleep. I tried to get some more rest, sacrificing everything in the process, but I was unsuccessful. Again, panic started to set in. I went for a walk, as I started to question everything in my life once more. I thought about quitting on my novel, I thought about giving up. But then I had a vision. I saw my character Brigid approaching me from out of the woods that flanked the road I was on. She rode astride her beautiful spotted Gypsy Vanner, and she wore upon her face her war paint. I saw her draw a sword, and with a sense of nagging guilt I lowered my eyes. She stopped before me. She tucked the point of the blade under my chin, and lifted my eyes back to her. With intensity in her visage, she looked down at me and simply nodded, as if to tell me to buck up... As though to remind me who I really am. In this image that I have created, I saw that I was strong as her, as proud as her, and as fierce. Some may laugh at the idea of a man finding strength in a woman, especially an imaginary one. But I have learned over the years that there is none as powerful as the Goddess, and there is nothing stronger than the will of a man who can dream of such a creature. By the illusions built of man by this power-over society, I have somehow fallen victim to the lies, and allowed myself to believe that I was weak. She came to me to remind me that I am not. She came to show me that the world is sick, and I have been temporarily effected by the disease. She came to tell me to get back to work now, and the sleep will come. I know now that I can overcome my anxiety and become yet again the man I once was long before this sickness had ever found me. The book is coming, and the world will what was lost. There is still hope.


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Revelation 13:18

"This calls for wisdom: let the one who has understanding calculate the number of the beast, for it is the number of a man, and his number is 666."

What if I told you this has already come to past...

Goddess in Flames
(Coming Soon!)



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news!

So I have unintentionally started a new novel last week. A powerful story that follows a young girl as she struggles over the loss of her best friend in a tragic car accident, and the man responsible for the death as he tries to reconcile with the families of whom he has damaged as a result of his reckless actions. A tale about love, anger, loss, and the greatest challenge to those whom have lost everything; forgiveness.
More info on that project as it develops. The working title is Heaven's Valley.
In other news, I'll be taking a break from the Chronicles stories to really focus on the development of my upcoming historic fiction, Goddess in Flames. I'm hoping to have a few more short stories ready to post in a week or two. I want to creat at least ten Chronicle stories which are all set in the world of GIF, but it all boils down on the spare time I will have available to me from now and until the deadline of my historic fiction. However, that is not to say that once I free up some space in my schedule after I finish the book, that I won't continue to write more Chronicle stories. I have tons of ideas for that. I may even release a book later that will contain all of my short stories that were set in that world.
This week I am also beginning an all new pinup sketch. I'll post the snap shots of my progress here on my blog.
Speaking of art! Next week on the 5th of February, I will be heading out to Tampa Bay to draw live caricatures at the Florida State Fair, which starts on the 6th. I hope to see you all there!


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Reading and writing is peace.

I have been struggling with some things lately. However, it seems that writing and or reading always takes me away from those incessantly annoying problems. Working on Goddess in Flames and reading Starhawk's Spiral Dance never ceases to quell my concerns that usually only ever cause me unnecessary stress. I have to keep working every time I'm feeling down, or just pick up a book that can remind me that everything is going to be just fine.
Anyhow!
Working on some short stories to post here on my blog. They are all centered around the world of my upcoming novel, Goddess in Flames, and will introduce you to some of the characters, and/or some of the problems that either relate, or will lead up to the events that the book is all about. Some of these stories are based on true stories, and others are just a little something to tease your interest in this project. My goal is to get you saying, "Well what happens next?"
And believe me, once you read Goddess in Flames, you will get your answers, however, these short tales will also give you a little piece of the adventure that you won't get from the book, so you might want to read them as well.
Goddess in Flames: Chronicles
a weekly series based on the upcoming novel.